February 23, 2005
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When I say death and dying I think I was focusing more on the process of resignation. The planning of those last precious months of life. At the hospital the focus is always on fighting death, prolonging it. It’s what the doctors are trained to do and it’s what every patient seems to want.
But I wonder if the woman wants to fight it. She’s a smart one, she’s probably looking at the numbers. But it’s not about the numbers with cancer, it’s about the fight. People can do amazing things with their minds. I’ve seen women beat something like this. Then again I don’t know the particulars of her pathology report, how aggresive her kind of tumor was. But I do know how many lymph nodes were positive, and it was the majority.
I wonder if she’s in her hospital bed right now thinking about all the special things she’s going to do while she still has time. I think that’s what I might do.
Comments (5)
Resignation is a tough question, a personal choice. I’m so glad that you’re able to be there with people as an open and empathetic person they can go to for support.
whoa…this makes my lttle tummy pain seen so vain…
you have much strength but i would say we all do when it comes to
dealing with bieng mortal…
a movie suggestion: My Life Without Me
A young woman finds out she is dying, forgoes telling her family to spare them the pain and decides to fulfill her list of things before her time comes…it’s a very good flick and all of this reminded me of it
Your comments bring to mind the age old question (which I just Freudingly typed as old age) “Is it better to have warning or not?” One daughter had a school chum killed in a car crash over the winter break.The other daughter had a friend fighting Hodgkins lymphona last year (so far successfully). Both families have suffered, one quickly and with finality. The other probably has the ongoing nagging fear of what might come back. I’m glad we don’t get to choose, but just have to deal with what life serves up.
So much about life can be resolved, made peace with, when there is time to die. And yet the sadness, too! And then the body can perform its own miracle and clear the cancer too. The ways of life and death, a mystery…
And I agree with you – it’s time to do everything you always wanted to do – and I would let go of restrictions and constrictions and live as fully as I could…
xo