August 20, 2009
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I don’t know why it took so long but it finally occurred to me to ask: Why me?
What I got, not in this order, was that I knew Steven, I didn’t have any preconceived ideas about God and the bible (When I said the bible was baloney I got a yes), I was willing, I could write, and I was intuitive. That was why. Originally I got that it was because I was brave but really it was about being willing. I was supposed to take the brave out. He doesn’t like ego.
What did occur to me at first was who else does this. Like in my city, I wanted to know if there were others, besides me and Steven. I got that there were two, both women. I even know one of them. Holy Crap! I just now discovered this. Holy Crap!
For some reason last night I didn’t have permission to say who it is and this morning I do. It’s the young woman I call Elizabeth, the one I met at a recorder function, the one who introduced me to Derek, the one who has that little brat-of-a boy, the one I used to go drinking with who is an herbalist and a hell of a musician — She plays another instrument in several orchestras. She has made such a huge mess of her life which I find unfathomable now that I know she has access to the kind of direction I’m getting. She chose to ignore it, is what I get.
I can’t stand to be around her; the disarray scares me. We got together several months ago when she contacted me to say she was moving and needed a book back. She was always loaning me all these great books I never read. We went to Powells and I bought her a new one. Somehow the sack with all her stuff disappeared when I came back from Florida. Then we drove to a place she’d taken me to that I loved, down in the basement. She had a few beers and I drank tonic and lime. We had a nice time but, and I love her, but her life is just nothing I can stand to hear about.
I just got back from going out after work with the young woman who has been training me, another court reporter. She’s a year older than Elizabeth, also an herbalist, fantastic cook, beautiful inside and out, a little crazy though. She, too gets yeses and nos, and knows how to clear energy. What’s going on???
Comments (3)
umm, why NOT you?
I’ve had to reread the last several blogs to make sense of this, and now it’s clicking. Always willingness before ego.
Even in that fallacious Bible. Hell, I didn’t know what you were up to when I wrote yesterday’s blog, but the synchronicity is always that and no coincidence. Do what you gotta do – is all I can tell you 
. I want to say something like Congratulations, but I’m not sure what the right wording is.
It is very amusing and appealing that God does not dig dogma. Wonder if the Koran would get similar answer to the baloney question. When I read parts of that (and this may be due to inaccurate translations) it always seems to be more unapologetic about ego. Almost demanding that ego be present and renamed as God’s will. Talking of the dogma only and not the religion associated of course.
You came to some logical answers about why and that makes this ego in me sated a bit. It loves logic enough to abide being starved at times.
Right place, right time, right skills, right people and right mindset. Sounds like a recipe for a win.